Merry Christmas to All

I know I have not written in quite some time...close to a month...but I cannot blame it all on being busy with family, the Nutcracker, etc.  At least some of it (probably the larger portion) has to be attributed to lack of discipline coupled with my tendency to procrastinate.  (By the way, if I may just say a little something about the Nutcracker, I had a blast!!  It was so much fun!  I hope I get to do it again next year!)  In any case, I wanted to write something in celebration of Christmas and the gift of love God gave us in the person of His Son, Jesus Christ.  I wrote a poem earlier this month, but I also want to include two songs (which I did not at all write) which I love and find particularly meaningful (and not just because one of them is actually a Christmas carol) because, like my poem, they don't just proclaim Christ's birth, they look ahead (implicitly or explicitly), to the fulfillment of what He was sent to do...which was to die (a horrible, undeserved death on a criminal's cross) for us so we don't have to pay the penalty for our sin.  

"O LITTLE TOWN OF BETHLEHEM"  (written in 1868 by Bishop Phillips Brooks)

O little town of Bethlehem,

How still we see thee lie!

Above thy deep and dreamless sleep

The silent stars go by.

Yet in thy dark streets shineth

The everlasting Light;

The hopes and fears of all the years

Are met in thee tonight.

For Christ is born of Mary,

And gathered all above,

While mortals sleep, the angels keep

Their watch of wondering love.

O morning stars together,

Proclaim the holy birth,

And praises sing to God the King,

And peace to men on earth!

How silently, how silently,

The wondrous gift is given;

So God imparts to human hearts

The blessings of His heaven.

No ear may hear His coming,

But in this world of sin

Where meek souls will receive Him still,

The dear Christ enters in.

O holy child of Bethlehem,

Descend to us, we pray!

Cast out our sin and enter in,

Be born in us today.

We hear the Christmas angels.

The great glad tidings tell;

O come to us, abide with us,

Our Lord Emmanuel!

"LORD OF THE DANCE"  (by Sidney Carter)

I danced in the morning

When the world was begun,

And I danced in the moon

And the stars and the sun,

And I came down from heaven

And I danced on the earth

At Bethlehem

I had My birth.

(chorus) Dance, then, wherever you may be,

I am the Lord of the Dance, said He,

And I'll lead you all, wherever you may be,

And I'll lead you all in the dance, said He

I danced for the scribe

And the pharisee

But they would not dance

And they wouldn't follow Me.

I danced for the fishermen, 

For James and John~

They came with Me

And the dance went on.

(chorus)

I danced on the Sabbath

And I cured the lame;

The holy people 

Said it was a shame.

They whipped and they stripped

And they hung Me on high

And they left Me there

On a cross to die.

(chorus)

I danced on a Friday

When the sky turned black~

It's hard to dance 

With the devil on your back.

They buried My body

And they thought I'd gone,

But I am the Dance

And I still go on.

Dance, then, wherever you may be,

I am the Lord of the Dance, said He,

And I'll lead you all, wherever you may be,

And I'll lead you all in the dance, said He.

ODE TO A BABY (written by me on 12/02/2008.  I am not sure of the title.  Suggestions?)

Real lasting joy and

the peace we all crave

from cradle to grave

comes not through the things

of this earth.

It comes by faith in

a promise of love

from the Father above,

through a babe born of

humble birth.

This heaven-sent gift~

the Majestic One,

Jesus, Divine Son,

came to a waiting

world below.

Separated from

God by our sin and 

the evil within

we were lost, without

hope, and so

it pleased God to send

His heavenly child;

this babe, meek and mild,

who grew to a man

full of grace.

Jesus, He who saves,

did the work of God

while on earth He trod...

gave all for the whole

human race.

By death on the cross

His work was complete.

What looked like defeat

was not, it was true

victory!

His birth, life, and death

our future secured,

by faith in the Lord,

restoration for

you and me!

       

Exaltation

I bless You

and praise You,

I worship and adore You;

I love and

exalt You,

I am humbled before You.

You are good,

You are God...

there is no one who compares

to Your love

and mercy,

and the beauty I find there.

In Your face,

in Your voice,

and Your sheltering embrace

I am lost.

I am found

in the presence of Your grace.

You are God,

You alone,

and You love someone like me...

I'm in awe,

and undone,

by this blessed mystery!

Mighty God,

gentle Lord,

how can I refuse to give

all my love

and praise?  It's 

by Your gracious hand I live.

Thanksgiving

Psalm 106:1~

“Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good, His love endures forever.”

I thank You, Father God, for Your constant and abiding presence.  I know You are always with me, whether I feel You or not~because that is a promise You have made to me, and You always keep Your word.  I thank You that You are always faithful, even when I am not.  Thank You for loving me, especially when I am so unlovable.  Thank You for Your grace, which I do not deserve, but always have whenever I need it.  Thank You for Your wisdom, which is always available to me, however often I ignore it.  I thank You for Your forgiveness, which You never withhold, no matter how many times a day I must ask for it. 

My God and Father, I thank You for the kindness You never fail to show me...especially when I neglect to show that same kindness to others.  I thank You that You always have time for me, although I do not take enough time to be with You.  Thank You for being my source of true comfort, however frequently I seek it elsewhere.  Thank You for being my defender, I need no longer defend myself.  Thank You for being an ever-present help in time of trouble, though I often forget to call on You.  I thank You for working everything out for my good, even though I may complain how bad things are.  Thank You that Your mercies are new every morning, though I dwell too often on past mistakes.  I thank You for the freedom I have in You, although I sometimes live as though I were still in chains.    

Almighty God and Father, I thank You for receiving my praise and worship, inadequate and insufficient though it may be.  Thank You for Your beauty and creativity, however infrequently I notice it or show appreciation for it.  Thank You for always answering my prayers, even when I do not recognize Your answers or when I complain that they were not what I wanted.  I thank You for Your perfect will, however often I stubbornly insist on my own.  Thank You for the gifts and abilities You have generously given me, in spite of how often I have wasted them or wished for others.  I thank You for being God of my life, however often I attempt to take control.  Thank You for being You.                  

Acrostics

Frustration (11/20/2008)

FEELING ANGRY, AND

REALLY

UPSET, EVEN

STRESSED, BY

THOSE WHO DAILY

REFUSE TO LISTEN

AND CHOOSE

TO DISOBEY

INSTEAD

OF DOING WHAT

NEEDS TO BE DONE STRAIGHT AWAY

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[You Are My] Saving Grace (07/11/2007)

You are my saving grace

SINNER                         GOD

ABJECT                         REDEEMED

VICTIM                         ACCEPTED

INSUFFICIENT           CLAIMED

NEEDY                          ENCOURAGED

GRIEVING

You are my saving grace

SELFISH                        GRACIOUSLY

ANGRY                           RESTORED

VICTIMIZER                 ADOPTED

INSECURE                     CLEANSED

NEGATIVE                    EQUIPPED

GODLESS

You are my saving grace, God! 

Hallelujah!

Prayer Requests

I have two prayer requests, if you all would be so kind.  The first is for Nathan, Sherry, and Brooklyn.  I cannot give any details, but I would really appreciate your prayers for them.  Please pray as Holy Spirit leads, and I think it would also be good to pray against the enemy's plans for them.

The second request is for me.  I had my first rehearsal for Nutcracker yesterday.  I realize it was my first rehearsal (only an hour long), and the other "adult party guests" have had at least two, if not three rehearsals already, but I really struggled with the dances.  There are two I have to learn, and I have never been able to do group dances, except the hora (and I don't even remember how to do that now).  The choreographer said I did a great job, but I think she was just being kind.  I know I have to be careful here, because I am something of a perfectionist, and I can be very hard on myself, but I truly felt lost.  I think I was paired with the guy who has been having a hard time getting the dances, and he is better than me.  I do not want to let anyone down.  I do not especially like the idea of embarrassing myself, either, but I can deal with that better than letting other people down.

I would be very grateful for your prayer support.  Thanks so much everyone.

Just a Little Update

Here is a little tidbit of news for you who read my blog: I am now doing the audio for all the devotions, done by women (with one exception), on christiandevotions.us.  I know I had mentioned some time ago that I was working with the Garage Band feature of my Macbook to do the voice-over for a book on caring for aging parents, and that I was doing the audio for my devotions, but that has now been expanded to include all the women that post on that website (except Cindy, she does her own).  I am excited to provide another avenue for people to be edified, encouraged, and exhorted through these devotions.  Having the devotions read and recorded means the visually impaired also have access to this ministry...which continues to expand, as they are now on the radio, too (Christian Devotions Speak, if I remember correctly). Check out christiandevotions.us sometime and click on the mp3 link to devotions done by Sue P. or Sue F., Ariel, Cathy, Sandra, and me, of course (I think my next one, "Just Keep Swimming", comes out on 11/01), and you will hear me reading them.  I am having a lot of fun with it!  Be blessed!    

Silver and Gold

I realize I haven't written for a while.  I am working on a couple things right now that I am just not ready to post.  In the meantime, I want to offer a couple poems.  One is old (well, 2006) and the other is new.  As I was considering the title of this post in relation to my poems, two things came to mind: a little song that you may remember from your childhood ("make new friends, but keep the old...one is silver and the other is gold") and the verse from Proverbs that is my new "Scripture of the Moment" (Proverbs 25:11~"A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.").  My poems are a bit like friends to me, in the sense that they have been used by God to help me through some difficult things, to teach and refine me, and to celebrate with me.  Also, it is my desire that the words I write would be timely and appropriate, would bless and encourage others, and would draw them to the Lord.  "Longing" was written in December of 2006 and "Musing" was written a couple of months ago. 

Longing

A longing fills my heart;

a desire to know, and be known by,

Someone so much greater than myself.

I’m yearning to be part

of a grand and beautiful design,

to have purpose and meaning beyond

what I have seen so far.

Lord, please give me new eyes,

that I may see Your reality;

the revelation of mighty things

so often in disguise.

Removing the veils of shame and fear

the enemy would use to blind me,

please rip away the lies.

I’m not who I once was.

Still, I am not yet who I will be.

This living in the now and not yet

is easier because

Your love is not content to leave me

as I am; You smooth and polish me

until I reflect...You.

Musing

As I sit here in the cool of

a summer’s evening

I hear the sound of crickets and

other night creatures.

Their song is loud, but comforting

to me, in a way.

It’s a sound I sometimes take for

granted...it’s always

there surrounding me, soothing my

spirit, drowning out

the clamor and cares of each day.

Your love is like that.

It is ever-present, always

encompassing me.

Your love pulls me up, lifting me

out of the mire

of self-doubt that would drag me down

to depths of despair.

Your kind and soothing voice drowns out

harsh, unloving words.

Memories of past rejection

are gone forever.

Your love shelters me and in your

embrace, I am home.

Take you for granted...how could I?

You are everything.

A Lullaby for Brooklyn

Finally!!  After numerous attempts, and much frustration, I was able to upload the video with Brooklyn's lullaby.  Thanks go to my good friend, PJ, who suggested I put the song in a video format!  I had to keep on trying (some problem with the server, I guess) but it finally worked!  So, here it is, I hope you enjoy it, Brooklyn sure does.  It works like a charm!

A Few Updates

My next devotion will be out this coming Saturday (christiandevotions.us and mountainbreezedevotions).  It is a re-working of my post "To Know Fully" and you can also hear me read it, so please do check it out.  They will be picking up another one, but I do not yet know when that one is slated to come out (watch for it, it is called "Just Keep Swimming").  I'll be reading that one, too.  In fact, I will probably be reading all my own devotions from now on, since the Garage Band feature of my Macbook does such a good job with this.  I will probably be sending them another one of my poems, too, but I haven't yet decided if it will be one I have already done, or a new one I am currently writing. 

I am still waiting to hear from Blue Mountain Arts about whether they will use my poem for one of their greeting cards.  They said it could be up to 4 months before I hear, so I could have a lot of waiting to do yet.  I have another one I could send them, and I am also kicking around some ideas for Valentine's Day.  I want to do some research on other greeting card companies to which I could submit my work.

I did receive a report from my mentor a few weeks ago, and I have read it, but the first month or so of school is usually so busy and draining for me that I have not really had much time or energy to do a ton of research on all the information he sent me.  I was quite pleased with the report, though.  

In the meantime, I still have not figured out how to get Brooklyn's lullaby on my blog.  Any ideas?          

Changes, a Frog, and a Lullaby

As you can see, I have changed my blog layout.  I like it a lot and it seems to be a good fit, so far.  I rearranged and added a couple things.  My quote from Mark Altrogee is all the way down at the bottom.  It may be missed by some people, but it looks good there.  I also added this cute walking frog to remind us to fully rely on God everyday (F.R.O.G.)!  He may or may not stay, but for now, he amuses me (and he is a vivid reminder to walk on, daily relying on God as I do).  Also, I have been working on some things in the Garage Band feature of my computer.  I have been practicing making vocal tracks so I can do voice-overs for my devotionals.  In my attempts to familiarize myself with this feature, I recorded a song I sing as a lullaby to Brooklyn every time I have her over.  It is an old folk song, entitled The Riddle Song.  I am hoping to be able to include it in my blog, but I am not quite sure how to make it work.  It is in mp3 format, and currently resides in iTunes, as well as Garage Band.  I hope to add it here, too.  When I figure it out, I will edit this post to include it.  My first attempt did not work.  Oh well, "if at first you don't succeed..."

09/29/08:  I have not yet figured out how to include, or link to, my mp3 of the lullaby.  Does anyone know how to do this?  Is it even possible?  I have tried to use the help feature, but they are refusing to help.

  

To Know Fully

"Then we shall see face to face...then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known." 

~1 Corinthians 13:12

I finally changed my "Scripture of the Moment" (that was some moment), to the verse you see above.  Well, somewhere else in this blog I warned you that I am queen of procrastination!  I am working on being more disciplined, but it hasn't fully caught on yet.  It does not help that I do not have the seemingly unlimited time I had during the summer, now that I am back to work.  What also does not help is the fact that work is leaving me fairly drained...physically, and somewhat emotionally, exhausted.  I have quite a challenging group of students, God bless them!  Actually, it is more the latter than the former.  I would have plenty of time to write if I didn't spend most of it in front of the television, but watching TV does not require as many brain cells as writing...and my brain cells are tired!  I have commented on other people's blogs, but that also seems easier than coming up with my own ideas and writing about them.  Somehow, though, I have got to break this chain of stress at work=exhaustion= excessive TV watching=lack of productivity=stress over my inactivity.  Enter today's post, which is not even meant to be about my lack of discipline.  Stay with me, faithful few, and read on.

I love the Scripture verse I chose to post today.  I love the promise it holds.  To one day see God face to face and truly know Him is something I desire deeply!  To behold His beauty, the brilliance of His countenance, and His majesty and splendor!  Can you imagine anything more wonderful?  I can.  What?  What could possibly be more wonderful than seeing the face of God?  Only one thing, really, and you probably guessed it already...it would be to know Him fully.  How awesome!  (In the very truest sense of that word, not in the way it is so often used now.)  To have full disclosure of God Most High!  No more wondering if I am understanding God correctly.  No more second-guessing.  No more doubting my ability to hear His voice.  I will know Him as He knows me.  Let me wrap my head around that one.  In what way does God know me?  Let me see...first of all, He created me.  Scripture tells me He knew me in my mother's womb, before I was even fully formed.  So, physically speaking, it would be safe to say that He knows me on a cellular, even a molecular level.  Scripture also tells me God knows the thoughts I think, as well as the intentions of my heart.  I don't fully know my own heart, but God knows it.  Also, I do not remember most of my past, but because God is outside of time and knows all, He knows everything I have forgotten.  I do not know what my future holds, but God knows that, too.  There is absolutely nothing about me that is hidden from Him, and this Scripture verse tells me that one day I will know Him as He knows me.  I will know Him fully and completely, in the same way He knows me!  What an amazingly generous and gracious God!  Oh, to know him fully!                                      

How Long Would You Last?!

I could survive for 57 seconds chained to a bunk bed with a velociraptor

A Tribute to My Best Friend

I feel quite nostalgic today.  You see, it is my 25th wedding anniversary, and my husband is in Las Vegas on a business trip.  He has called me several times today (sweet man!) but, of course, I would rather have him here in person.  Until he comes home Friday, I will have to content myself by looking at photographs and reflecting on 25 years of marriage to my best friend.  In honor of my husband and the day, I would like to share some thoughts about this great guy I have had the pleasure to know and love all these years!

Several of you know my husband, but here are a few things you may not know about John.  He is a very good bowler, photographer, and dancer.  In fact, he used to be a dance instructor with Arthur Murray (while he was in the Army, he was written up in the base newspaper because he gave dance lessons to his fellow soldiers)!  John was in the Army for 3 three years.  About half of that time was spent on the island of Okinawa, where he copied Morse code for Army Intelligence.  It is also where he sustained a collapsed lung.  He has some pretty serious-looking scars as a souvenir of his stay in Okinawa.  John has a nickname, "Kracker", which was his father's before him (actually, I think his father's nickname was "Krackers").  Perhaps I should say, "had", because no one calls him by that name anymore, and it is all my fault!  When I met John, and especially when we began dating, I always called him John so, gradually, everyone else did, too.  Later, after we had been married some time, I used John's old nickname as part of my e-mail address.  John jokingly said, "You take my last name, you take my nickname, you take everything!"

I smile when I think about...

...the time I told John I wouldn't go out with him (after we had been seeing each other for 4 or 5 months), which was the same night John was going to tell me how he felt about me.

...when John asked me to marry him, he had written 1st Corinthians 13 on a beautiful card, at the bottom of which he had also written "Kate, will you be my wife.", just like that...no question mark.  I nodded and said, "For sure!"

...John kissing me 3 times during the wedding ceremony (twice before Bruce even said, "you may now kiss the bride"!  Bruce then said, "Hmm, eager!"

...when Nathan was born at the Birthing Center of Delaware, John was crouching at the foot of the bed with a backwards baseball cap on his head, ready to "catch" our baby!

...the day John brought home a new car (in the colors I wanted) without any warning, like he was bringing home the groceries.

...what a good dancer John is.  I always enjoy any opportunity we have to dance together.  (I love being in his arms!)

...how John never complains when I send him to the store for "personal" products.  He has even directed other guys on their first foray down the feminine hygiene aisle.

...how John often teases and torments me during church, then acts like he isn't doing anything and tells me, "shh, we're in church!"

...John's frequent (read: almost daily) comment to me, "You're too much!",  for absolutely no reason at all (she said with her tongue planted firmly in her cheek)!

John has taught me that it is good to be quiet together, it is perfectly acceptable to be on time (even early) for things, that it is fun to visit the neighbors, that working in the garden is not fatal (well, not to me...but to the plants...)!

I am so thankful to God for bringing us together!  John is such a blessing in my life.  I cannot imagine life without him.  I sometimes feel like I fly through life by the seat of my pants, but John keeps me grounded.  What can I say, he is simply the best!

"Nothing in this world is single; all things by law divine in one spirit mix and mingle; why not I with thine?"  (Percy Bysshe Shelley)

"Shared laughter is love made audible."  (Izzy Gesell)  

  

    

A Little News

Hey guys, check out www.christiandevotions.us, my devotion (Triumph of Light) has been posted!  And they spelled my name correctly!  Let me amend that last statement....my name is spelled correctly on Mountain Breeze, but not on Christian Devotions.  :-(  Oh well, one of these days they'll get my whole name correct!  In any case, it's there! 

My name has been corrected, yay!

Let's Play a Little Game

Here is a fun little game for all you wordsmiths out there!  Write a sentence (or more) in which the last 2 letters of each word are the first 2 letters of the word after it.  It doesn't have to be factual or the prettiest sentence ever written, but it must make sense and be at least somewhat correct in it's gramatic structure.  For example:  

No novice celebrities escape periodicals.

One near arrest stopped Edward.

I am looking forward to reading your sentences...it should be fun!  Let the games begin!!

(BTW, your sentences need to be more than 4 words long.)   

A New Leaf

Over the years I have been challenged by numerous people to be more disciplined in my writing habits which, as a person seriously gifted in procrastination, has been a challenge I have largely put off or ignored (imagine that)!  I am really trying to turn that around and this blog has been a small step in that direction.  I was reading someone's blog earlier and this person had written his post as a poem and issued a challenge to other bloggers to match it.  Since I am turning over a new leaf and accepting more challenges (haha), I thought, why not?  I was really surprised by how quickly I was able to come up with something.  I don't say that in a prideful way...it's just that I have had difficulty sitting myself down and making myself write.  I have often felt that what I have written has just been dropped into my head from above.  This time I actually made an effort to accomplish something specific in a specific period of time.  I have rarely done this.  Actually, I did it yesterday, too, when my husband told me he wants me to write a poem a day...and I did!  I think it will actually be the next one I send to Blue Mountain Arts.  (They e-mailed me today, as a matter of fact, to let me know that they received my submission.  Now I just have to wait-up to 4 months, ugh-before I know if it has been accepted for publication.)  The point is, this is new for me!  Now, I am not saying that the poem I wrote in response to the blogger's challenge will make me the next poet laureate of Delaware, but it was respectable.  I include it here because...well, I wrote it, and why should his blog have all the fun?!

It is untitled, but here it is:

Facing a blank page

my mind begins to race...

what can I possibly write

that will speak to a person's heart?

I want to be real,

write words that make you feel

something more than you expect.

Thoughts fly by, oh where do I start?

But then it all clicks

into place and just fits;

what wasn't suddenly is

and I'm glad I had a small part!    

A Petition

To all of you dear friends who read my blog (all 3 of you... you know who you are!), and to any others who may read but never leave a comment, I make this request for prayer.  I have just submitted one of my poems for publication with Blue Mountain Arts.  You may have seen their greeting card line at a Cracker Barrel, in addition to Hallmark stores.  It is my first attempt at submitting anything I have written.  It may be anywhere from 2 to 4 weeks before I receive a reply, but I will keep you posted.  I am in the hands of a gracious God who delights to give us the desires of our hearts and who has a plan for me that exceeds what I can imagine.  I choose to stand in faith in that place of peace.  Thank you for your loving encouragement and support.    

A Boy's Life?

I might be cheating a bit with today's post.  Don't get me wrong, I wrote it, but my blog is not the first place this post has appeared.  I was reading another person's blog earlier today (themoabclub.blogspot.com) and her blog entry prompted this comment from me.  She is the mother of 3 boys, with a fourth boy on the way.  She was describing the destruction to property and belongings that can occur in a houseful of boys (to be fair to her boys, she said she would describe the heart-warming moments on another day).  Not that Nathan was a model child, but I was hard-pressed to think of anything he had broken.  Here was my comment (more or less):

Maybe time has erased the portion of my memory reserved for things my son has damaged while growing up, because I cannot recall anything he has actually destroyed.  I think I have broken more dishes than he ever did!  No, my son was content to turn his destructive capabilities on himself.  The catalog of his injuries includes:

*a cut on his chin caused by an unfortunate collision with a wrought iron table when he was a toddler

*about 10 concussions, 2 of which were serious enough to warrant a hospital stay

*a dime-sized hole in his soft palate caused by a plastic ruler (a fraction of an inch in another direction and he would have needed surgery)

*a stubbed toe which caused him to lose a toenail

*a fairly deep cut to his finger which was caused when he was cutting raw cabbage with my chef's knife (he had awoken before me and had decided to make his own lunch for school); he bandaged himself and cleaned up all the blood before he woke me up to tell me what he had done

*a broken elbow sustained while skateboarding

*numerous cuts, scrapes, and scratches which have scarred my beautiful boy

This list does not include the braces and 2 oral surgeries he needed because he was an orthodontic nightmare, or the head-to-toe rash he received after he had been stung by a wasp while in high school (that was the day we discovered he was allergic to bees and would need to carry an epi-pen for the rest of his life...which he has refused to do since he was 18 or 19 years old).  This list does not include the time he was driving too fast and ran his car off the road and into a drainage ditch full of water 10 feet deep, making it necessary to kick out the car window in order to keep from drowning.  Nor does it include the tattoos down his spine and on the backs of both upper arms, or his 2 piercings (one on his tongue and one below his bottom lip).  He has since let the piercings close up but, of course, the tattoos are still there.  This list also does not include his potential for injury now that he is in the Army and could possibly be sent into harm's way.

These events throughout my son's life have caused more than a few anxiety-producing moments and I would happily exchange them for any number of broken blinds, ruined haircuts, and shattered light fixtures.  If it were not for the gracious, tender-loving care of my Abba God and the peace that comes from Him in spite of all these events, I would probably need to be medicated!  I would like to think it is a boy thing, but I suspect it might run deeper than that.  My son's baby (a very sweet, precocious, and active 11 month old girl) has recently started walking.  She is quick, but unsteady, on her feet.  She also has no fear and does not know there are things she cannot yet do...a recipe for potential danger, if you ask me.  I have to trust that she, like her father before her (like all of us) is in the strong and capable hands of God Almighty, who is well able to bring good out of every dangerous situation.             

Cool Beans

If you check out my blog list, you will notice (among the blogs of my friends) Christian Devotions and Mountain Breeze Devotions.  These are 2 devotional websites.  If you click on them and scroll down past Virginia Smith's devotion ("What Is That Smell?", is the name of her devotion), you will see me!!  My bio, my picture, and my poem, Peace!  Click on the title and you will hear me reading my poem.  (By the way, read their devotions, too, they're very nice.  They have gone from something like 97 hits to 5,000+ hits in 6 months or so!)

My next devotion, Triumph of Light, was scheduled for Monday, 09/08, but it has been moved up one week, I think.  I'll let you know for sure when it comes out.  Also, I just did a voice-over for them (the people that have these 2 devotional websites) yesterday.  They did a promotional video for  a couple authors who wrote a book about being caregivers for aging parents and they asked me to do the voice-over for the video!  It will be on You Tube.  I may have more opportunities to do voice-overs for them in the future.  Cool, huh?!

  

Taking Out the Trash

In my continuing efforts to make my blog enjoyable to read and to view, I have decided to throw out "This Day in History".  I have replaced it, for now, with "Beautiful Butterflies" and "Quotes from the Bard".  Both are to the right, below the "About Me" section.  The William Shakespeare quotes are above my blog list, the butterflies are below it.  

My reason for removing the history link?  I have no control over what piece of history appears on my blog.  I was prepared for the possibility that some serious topics would be presented, which is to be expected when you are dealing with the history of humanity.  As I was checking my blog for new comments, however; I noticed the history entry for today was particularly difficult for me to read, especially given the nature of my blog.  I hope that everyone who decides to visit my blog is blessed in some way.  I did not feel they would be if they should happen to read today's history entry.  I felt the account was far too disturbing and graphic.  Since the bits of history are randomly selected there is no guarantee that something like this couldn't happen again.  I am not comfortable with that possibility.  I don't imagine I will have the same problem with the bard or the butterflies, but if they get out of line...out they go!!

If any of you caught today's history lesson before I was able to remove it, please accept my sincere apologies.  My commitment to you is that my blog will always be a safe place for you to hang out.  Be blessed.       

The Brothers M

Minkus, Magnus, Marvin, and Merriwether McGhee were the infamous brothers M.  Wherever they managed to go, news of their madcap exploits preceded them.  They were each born on a Monday, in the merry month of May, and how that came about was more than anyone could say.  Miranda was their mother, and Marcus was their dad; their pet was a mutt named Magoo, the best dog a kid ever had.  Minkus and Magnus were born in Montana, and Marvin was born in Maine.  Massachusetts was meant to be the birthplace of Merriwether McGhee, but he was actually born on a plane.  (It was flying over Vermont, somewhere near Montpelier!)  They were mad about Motown music and movies and museums (and Magoo loved opera at the Met), but they had to stop going when their mom said they may not bring their pet.  They had many books and magazines and model planes and cars.  They also had a million marbles in some mustard jars.  They spent most vacations in Miami, or maybe in Mexico (Minkus and Magnus love Mexico best because it's where the monarch butterflies go).  One Monday evening meal, over meatloaf and mashed potatoes, Marvin said he wanted to buy a Manx cat.  The next morning, with his mad money, he bought one (named her Mayonnaise) and that was the end of that.  Magoo loved Mayonnaise and Mayonnaise loved Magoo, and everywhere the brothers M went, Magoo and Mayo went, too.  Minkus, Magnus, Marvin, and Merriwether McGhee were (along with Magoo and Mayo) the best of friends, and they were also family.

(This is part of a children's book I am in the process of writing.)      

Your Honest Opinion Appreciated

I thought it would be fun to add a new gadget to my blog.  If you scroll down to just below the "About Me" section on the right, you will see it ("This Day In History", right above my blog archive).  I am not sure if I will keep it.  I may swap it out with quotes by William Shakespeare.  I may change its location to the very bottom of the page (where I used to have "Scripture of the Moment", you can see that gadget is now above the "About Me" section to the right).  Please let me know what you think.  I am interested in your honest opinion.         

Photo Op, Part 3

As you can see, I have added some new photos!  The top photo of my son, Nathan, in his class A's, was taken by me during our visit on his graduation day (08/07/08).  He gave me the photo below that.  He looks very handsome in uniform, doesn't he?  

We had a wonderful visit with him!  I was concerned about Brooklyn's reaction to him, 9 weeks away is a long time in her little life.  She recognized him right away when she saw him and they got along famously, as if he had never left!  It was hard to leave him when we took him back to the base at the end of the day but, hopefully, we will be able to visit him during his 18 weeks in Georgia.  I took some great pictures of Nathan, Sherry, and Brooklyn.  They may show up as a slide show on my blog, but I have to figure out how to do it first.       

"Life Is A Highway", Part 2

Well, Nathan has graduated from Basic Training in Fort Leonard Wood, Missouri and is now en route to Fort Gordon, Georgia for 18 weeks of training for his MOS (Military Occupation Specialty).  John, Sherry, Brooklyn, and I are on our way home.  

Nathan's graduation ceremony was impressive.  215 other young men and women, from 37 states and 3 countries (if my memory is correct), ranging in age from 17 to 38 years, graduated along with Nathan.  They marched throughout Baker Theater, calling out their cadence, until they came to the section reserved for them and sat down, as one person.  Periodically, a Drill Instructor would say something and the entire company would respond in unison.  Each platoon was called up, with their Drill Instructor calling out a cadence to which they would respond as they marched up to the stage.  After they were assembled on the stage, each soldier came forward and gave his/her rank, last name, and home state (or country, as the case may be...Jamaica, North Korea, and South Korea were represented in addition to the U.S.A.), then marched back to his/her seat.  Each soldier was acknowledged by the applause and cheers of his/her family and/or friends in attendance.  When each platoon was finished, the entire theater broke out in cheers and applause.  What impressed me about this ceremony was that all 216 soldiers marched, sang, sat down, and stood up as one person.  I had a very strong reaction to this, which I could not have imagined prior to witnessing it.  My heart was stirred within me, tears sprang to my eyes, and I became aware that I was not only overwhelmed with pride, I felt that I was part of all this.  I was not prepared for the strength of my reaction, of my feelings. I am not talking about patriotism here.  I am talking about esprit de corps ("the feeling of pride, fellowship, and common loyalty shared by the members of a particular group; literally 'spirit of the body'").  Whatever your opinion of the Army (or of the military in general), one thing in which they excel is to instill within each soldier the importance of the other.  To understand they are each a part of something bigger than their individual selves.  All of their creeds and cadences convey this idea.  They speak of loyalty to country, to company, to comrades.  

This idea goes beyond the cadences to which they keep time as they march.  Every aspect of Basic Training is designed to get each soldier to think of him or herself as part of a company, a team; dedicated to a common goal and common ideals.  You might say, "that is nothing new, the Army has always done that", and you would be correct, but it is new to Nathan.  Not the ideals of selflessness, service, loyalty, cooperation, or thinking of others more highly than oneself, because John and I have tried to teach and model these ideals to Nathan all his life.  He also attended a vibrant church more than half his life, and attended private Christian schools where these same ideals were valued and promoted.  They just didn't seem to stick.  As an only child with a very independent nature, Nathan's frequent response to anything we tried to teach him was, "I know!"  Then he would often proceed to do what he wanted.  He has been resistant to mostly everyone in authority over him most of his life.  I was shocked when he said he wanted to join the Army and I wondered whether he would succeed.  I prayed he would.  I prayed that through this experience God would accomplish His purpose in and through my son.

My son has only just finished Basic Training.  He has barely begun his 4 years of service, but I have already noticed changes in Nathan.  To anyone else, those changes may seem too small to be significant, but I choose to stand in faith that they are a foretaste of things to come.  One of the changes I noticed was the way Nathan carried himself.  It wasn't just the way he stood up straight.  He seemed to walk with purpose and confidence, like someone who has somewhere to go and knows how to get there.  Prior to joining the Army, he just seemed to amble.  He had an air of "whatever" about him.  I did not notice any of that in his walk or his demeanor upon graduating.

A changed walk or demeanor is not all that is needed, there is more work yet to be done, but isn't that true of all of us?  We are all on a journey and each of us is on a different leg of that journey.  Remember, "life is a highway"?  As John, Sherry, Brooklyn, and I passed through Effingham County (in Illinois) today (08/08/08) on our journey home, I saw a water tower upon which was written the words: "Crossroads of Opportunity".  I believe that is where Nathan is on his journey right now, at the crossroads of opportunity.  He has a decision to make; an opportunity to become all he is meant to be (in God, not just in the Army), or to continue in the same attitudes and patterns of behavior that were not really working for him.  

Each of us has this same opportunity.  As we travel down the highway of our lives, we will encounter many crossroads of opportunity.  By God's grace we will make the most of the opportunities He presents to each of us.  By God's grace, we will always move toward growth in Him.  That is my prayer for Nathan, for myself, for you.              

"Life Is A Highway"

I have been traveling with my husband, daughter-in-law, and granddaughter.  We are on our way to see my son graduate from Basic Training.  I am very excited!  The closer we get the more my excitement grows, causing tears to well up as I think of finally getting to see him.  We are in St. Louis, Missouri, not quite 2 hours from Fort Leonard Wood, where he has been this past 9 weeks.  While passing through Ohio, we drove over a lengthy and bumpy stretch of highway.  Sometimes life is like that.  There are stretches along life's highway that are just difficult and seem to go on forever.  We have been through such a time with our son.  

From birth our son has been a strong-willed and independent individual, which has often made parenting him challenging.  When he entered adolescence, particularly his mid to late teens, those challenges increased and grew in intensity.  He made a series of rash and foolish decisions that had serious, life-altering consequences.  Actually, all decisions, rash or otherwise, result in life-altering consequences to one degree or another.  The decisions Nathan made carried the potential of devastating loss to himself and others.  Loss of relationship, of livelihood, of freedom, of his physical and mental well-being, even of life and limb, were all very real possibilities.  

At times his father and I were at a loss as to what to do or say.  All we could do was pray and trust God that He would protect and preserve Nathan and bring him through this bumpy patch of road.  As we rounded each bend in the road and continued to see more of the same it sometimes became difficult to do even that.  My husband became depressed and withdrawn.  Many times I felt as if I was carrying this burden alone.  Of course I wasn't, but that was how I felt.  I wanted to talk to my best friend, but he was so overwhelmed by everything with our son that he could only function in survival mode; basic self-preservation: sleep, work, and eat just enough to sustain life.  

At some point, in the midst of the stress, strife, and struggle of life on the home front, I went through a difficult year at work, as well.  I was contemplating leaving my job and went so far as to inform my principal that I might not return after summer vacation.  I considered employment elsewhere, but nothing opened up for me.  I did not have the option of retiring.  As September approached, I was afraid of what the school year would bring.  There was no apparent change at home and I did not think I could handle another year at work like the one before, but I had to find a way.  Whatever happened at home or at work, I had to find a way to cope.  

Coping was made easier by the strong support system I had among my friends and spiritual family at church and at work, and among certain members of my physical family.  I am eternally grateful to God for this great blessing.  Through it all, God kept me in the palm of His hand.  Through it all, His peace sustained me.  Difficult though it was, God was (is) my strong tower, my place of refuge.  Safe within this protected place of peace I know everything will work out no matter how it may appear, no matter how long it takes.  In the midst of it all has been His peace and the hope (like an anchor to my soul) that this difficulty would pass and that God would bring good out of it.  

Good has come out of some of it, but even though things have been better lately on all fronts, I know we are not in the clear yet.  I have traveled down life's highway long enough to know that the way is never smooth forever.  Rough road happens.  You can't always get around it, sometimes you just have to go through it.  The thing is, you never have to go through it alone.  You can stand in the peace the love of God provides and underneath it all are His everlasting arms.  The way will not always be smooth but His peace will get you through the rough places.  Even so, sometimes the way is just hard and all you can do is strap yourself in and ride it out.  As you travel down life's highway, you can do so joyfully if you remember God not only goes with you, He has gone before you and has prepared the way.  He is not surprised by the rough patches in the road, He knows the way.  He is the way!  Life is a highway, buckle up.                

A Noble Theme

Scripture Of The Moment:  "My heart is stirred by a noble theme as I recite my verses for the king; my tongue is the pen of a skillful writer."  (Psalm 45:1 NIV)

This is one of my favorite Scripture verses.  It is my desire to praise and worship God in a way that truly welcomes, blesses, and glorifies Him.  I want to set a place for Him at my table.  I want to be able to sing and speak and write of my love for Him in the way He deserves.  I want others to know His worth.  I know that He will not love me more if I am able to do this, nor love me less if I am not, but there is something within me that cries out: "Oh My God and King, help me to praise You more!  Help me to give You worship that is worthy of You!"  And so I sing to Him, or I write a love letter or poem to Him.  I want to give Him the best that I have, because He is worth it.  Others may hear or read my words and decide they are, or are not, good enough; that is okay.  They are not really my targeted audience.  I have an audience of One, and His opinion is what matters most.  If my praise and worship draws others to God, I am grateful, but even that is not my primary motivation.  My heart is stirred by the worth of the kindest, most loving, and most gracious Person I could ever know!  He is not only the recipient of my theme, He is the theme!                

Peace

I said this blog was a collection of my thoughts, musings, ramblings, and other writings.  Here is a poem of mine.  I wrote it in 1998, but it's topic is always relevant.  I think it is particularly relevant for this time and season.

Still my heart

like the peaceful waters of a deep blue lake,

unruffled

by the ripples and the waves the world would make.

In my heart

I hear Your voice; it's calling out to me, and

I know peace

beyond all the circumstances that I see.

Lasting peace,

though the world around me crumbles.

Sweet peace,

though mankind against me rumbles.

Abiding peace,

through Jesus Christ who died for me.  

Photo Op, Part 2

Okay, what kind of Kiki would I be if I didn't have at least one photograph of my granddaughter on my blog.  In case you are wondering, Kiki is my version of Grandmother, Grandmom, MomMom, or whatever grandmotherly appellation you can think of.  I love being a grandmother, I have just never been too fond of the names that come with the job!  There is a website you can visit that tells you how many people in the United States have your same name.  When I went to that site, I found out that I am the only one with my name (I checked using my married name and my maiden name).  It stands to reason that I would prefer to be called something unique to me!  Brooklyn is not able to call me anything yet, she is pretty much in the nearly-non-stop-chattering-of-unintelligible-syllables-stage.  When she is able to call me something intelligible, I will be happy to accept whatever moniker she chooses to give me (because that name will hold meaning for her), but until then...Kiki it will be!

Photo Op

I wanted a photograph of my husband and me on my blog, so I found the one to the right.  I realize it is not a current photo, but there are very few of John, or of the two of us together, because he is usually the photographer.  My hair is different now.  It is darker red and, while it would still be considered short by most people, it is quite a bit longer than what you see in this picture.  I have different glasses, too.  John, however, looks exactly the same.  I will probably keep this one on my blog, even if I do post another, more up-to-date picture.  This is a wonderful picture of the two of us and I love it!  I chose the song title "Feels Like Home To Me" as the caption for this photograph because if home really is where your heart is, as the saying goes, then John is my home.         

Under Construction

Is it my imagination or does it seem that everywhere you look there is some type of construction going on?  Roads, bridges, housing developments, strip shopping centers (goodness knows, we don't have enough of those)...it can be very annoying and inconvenient at times.  I wish I could tell you that you won't find any of that here but that would be a lie, and I try not to lie to anyone (except perhaps, to myself, and I'm working on that, too).  My blog is currently under construction, as you may have noticed (I hope you have noticed, otherwise, what's the point?).  I am a novice where blogging is concerned, and I am also getting used to a new computer, so my skills with both are in a process of development.  Some things I am learning are by trial and error, some are by attending One On One sessions at my local Apple Store.  I haven't received much instruction about all things blog at The Apple Store, we're pretty much at MAC 101 right now (possibly forever), so where my blog is concerned it is mostly trial and error and checking out other blogs.  I have expanded my personal profile, adding text and a photograph, so please check it out.  The text will probably stay the same (I may add an interest, a movie, or a book from time to time), but the photograph will change periodically.  (By the way, I took that photograph of the lily myself with my cell phone camera, I can't believe how well it turned out...I am not an accomplished photographer!  I was at Longwood Gardens with my friend, Lynn, earlier this summer and I took so many photographs I filled my phone memory, so there are more to come.)  Beneath my blog's title, Thinking Out Loud, I have added a description, the raison d'etre of my blog, if you will.  Please take a moment to scroll all the way down to the bottom of this page.  I have added another element of text, entitled: SCRIPTURE OF THE MOMENT.  It will change periodically.  I am not organized enough to commit to change it everyday or every week (or month, let's be real here), so "MOMENT" is just vague enough to let you know it will change at some point, just keep checking.  I may or may not allude to it in a post, it depends on how I feel at the moment.  Maybe by now you have noticed that I am not really the type of person who is, shall we say, skilled at planning.  I am not, as I have previously stated, a terribly organized person.  I am not a list-maker or administrative-type.  Don't get me wrong, I have nothing but appreciation and admiration for people like that...my mother is a planner and a list-maker and I have some friends who are truly gifted organizers and administrators, but I am more of a fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants kind of gal.  I can manage a certain amount of organization at work (as a teacher it is a necessity), but it seems to dissipate as the work day draws to a close.  In my home life, the amount of organization I can muster is inconsistent at best.  In the summer, forget about it, I am completely undisciplined.  This brings me to the area most in need of reconstruction and development: me.  I want to be at least a little more disciplined, but I find it incredibly overwhelming.  I am not a good steward of my time.  I procrastinate horribly.  This past spring I went to a writer's conference (Delaware Christian Writers Conference) for the very first time.  I loved it!  I plan to go next spring (in fact, I did plan ahead for this, I have already paid for it!).  My goals for this summer were to write every day, do research, and begin to market myself.  Have I done this?  Well, um, ah, let me see, how can I put this?  In a word, NO!  I did start this blog, so I am writing something, albeit inconsistently.  I did write another letter story for the children's book I hope to finish-and-someday-get-published-before-I-die.  I only have 15 to go to finish the alphabet (which I think I started in the 90's) :-P.  All this to say that I am, like so much around me, a work in progress.  While it can be annoying and inconvenient at times, it is necessary and hopefully (by God's infinite grace and mercy), a sign of positive growth (unlike strip shopping centers).